For the Groom

Funny Words of Advice to the Groom

A wife will use the word "fine" to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.  

If your wife is getting dressed and she says "five minutes", this means half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

When you ask your wife what's wrong and she replies "nothing" then this is the calm before the storm. This means something and you should be on your toes. I've learnt that arguments that begin with nothing usually end with the word fine.

If your wife says "go ahead" this is a dare not permission - don't do it!

If your wife gives a loud sigh this is a non verbal statement often misunderstood by a husband. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing there arguing with you about nothing.

If your wife says "that's okay" in an argument then be aware that it's one of the most dangerous statements a wife can make to a husband. It means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

If you hear your wife saying "Don't worry about it, I've got it" be aware that this is a dangerous statement. This means it's something that she's asked you to do several times but is now doing it herself. This will later result in you asking "What's wrong" and the wife's response will be "nothing"

Source from http://www.bestmanspeechhelp.com/funny-best-man-speech.html

Grooming Tips for the Groom

Your wedding day is one of the times that you won’t get by with greasy hair, chewed nails, and wearing your dirty alma mater hoodie. We know it’s not always easy for us guys to take the time to look good (it’s just so much easier not to). Here are some simple steps the groom can take to look his best on the big day:

Hair Cut

This one’s obvious. Get your hair cut about a week in advance of the wedding. 

Stick to your normal barber and with your usual style. You don’t want to experiment with a new look that you’re not going to be able to undo before the wedding.

Try a Manicure/Pedicure

All joking aside, trying a manicure/pedicure might not be a bad idea. There are sure to be many up close photos of the rings, so you want your nails to look great. Plus, they’re actually kind of relaxing (or so we hear).

Get a Massage

Who doesn’t love a massage? If you’ve never been to a professional masseuse, we strongly recommend it. It’s the perfect way to release all of that wedding planning stress and tension. If you’re looking for a creative groomsmen gift, how about treating all of your boys to one as well?

Take a Trip to the Dentist

Can you even remember the last time you had a dentist appointment? Get your teeth cleaned about a month before the wedding and continue your normal brushing routine. (3 times a day, right?)

Tickets to the Gun Show

Many groom-to-be’s start a workout routine in the months before the wedding in order to get ripped for the big day as well as the honeymoon. Our advice is to push back your tux fitting as long as possible so you can take account for your bulging biceps.

Eat Well, Drink Well

Keeping a good diet will contribute greatly to your wedding day looks. Drink lots of water to keep your skin healthy and clear. Avoid fast food to maintain that physique you’ve worked so hard to develop. Of course, we’d tell you to cut out beer – but we want to be taken seriously.

Source from http://www.mywedding.com

Wedding Preparation Lists for the Groom, Best Man and Ushers

While there are some tasks that need to done early in the wedding planning, the groom also has responsibilities for the Big Day, including preparing his team for a smooth, successful event. 

Here are some basic task lists for the men to review.

For the groom:

• Buy an engagement ring.

• Prepare a guest list and indicate who should be seated in reserved pews.

• Invite friends to be the best man and ushers in the wedding.

• Visit the formal-wear specialist to select the wedding attire.

• Choose gifts for the bride, the best man and the ushers.

• Select the wedding ring (this should be done with the bride).

• Plan the honeymoon (this should be done with the bride) in time to assure getting reservations.

• Apply for the marriage license. Check state and local requirements about the time required. This should be obtained several weeks before the wedding and given to the best man the day of the wedding, along with the clergyman’s fee.

• Check to be sure that all of the necessary papers — blood tests, birth certificates, etc. — are complete and available upon request.

For the best man:

• Take charge of the ushers; brief them on special seating arrangements during the rehearsal.

• Keep the wedding ring and have it the day of the ceremony or be sure the ring bearer carries out instructions properly.

• Have the marriage license and clergyman’s fee on hand.

• Help the groom get ready for the wedding.

• Call for and escort the groom to the wedding. Be there at least 15 to 30 minutes before the ceremony begins.

For the ushers:

• Be at the wedding site at least one hour before the ceremony.

• Have a typed list of guests occupying reserved pews. As the guests arrive, ask whether they are friends of the bride or groom and seat them accordingly.

Source from http://www.mlive.com/weddings/index.ssf/2011/01/wedding_preparation_lists_for.html